Putting out a hit on wolves

First off, let me make clear I have nothing against hunting or wolves.

Which is why I’m annoyed that the state Legislature is considering spending $300,000 to prevent the return of gray wolves to Utah.

I believe a Utahn can be an environmentalist and a hunter, so I’d be delighted to know wolves are roaming again in their historic territory—it just makes us wilder in the eyes of tourists.

Yes, the wolves will knock off a lamb, here and there (for which the government will reimburse the rancher), and yes, they’ll kill weak members of the deer, elk and moose populations, which should produce a healthier, smarter herd that is more challenging to hunt.

Besides, when the state gets wolf numbers to the point they are taking weak and slow-witted members of the human population—we can sell permits at astronomical amounts to trophy freaks. (Not to mention the jump in fees for concealed weapon licenses.)

What would be a more meaningful challenge to a two-legged predator than to stalk one of North America’s wiliest four-legged predators? Afterall, no one believes that hunting big game is about bringing home cheap protein.

Case in point, a trophy hunter bid $310,000 (that would buy a big-assed steak, for sure) for the right to hunt a buck mule deer on Antelope Island.

Now, all we have to do is get the Boone & Crockett Club to add a trophy category for the biggest, ugliest wolf. They already have listings for cougar and jaguar.